Well to start with, I was born in Hartlepool, a lovely little port on the North East coast. Amongst other more picturesque things, we have a nuclear power station at which, as a child, I once bought a knock-off Gordon The Gopher puppet. The squeaker broke.
I've been playing music for longer than I can remember. It all started with a piano my dad was looking after for a friend. Now I play as many instruments as I can, but I always come back to the piano. It's just a shame it's so bloody heavy - have you ever tried getting to a gig with a baby grand on your back? I look like an ant trying to impress the rest of the colony. Then I get stuck in the entrance to the nest and all the workers and soldiers start giving me lip, clicking their mandibles impatiently, which just makes things worse. The Queen, naturally, is livid.
I write a lot of music, and occasionally they let me out in public to perform, either just with the piano or with one of several bands.
My name is Peter Falconer. I'll have a black lapsang souchung with a spoonful of honey, please.
